Throwback Thursday: Is It Really Mine?

It should be mine...
...but before I make this world my b*tch; I must sift throught the bullshit, shake off the doubt, & focus my energy.
Where I am?
It's hard. It requires out-of-the-box thinking.
The way I've been programmed since birth? Impossible.
My thoughts, wants & needs were not my own. They were instilled in me. No refund or exchange.
Oppose? They dared me to.
I can't deal with kiss a$ses.
I haven't reluctantly puckered up for a$s since my mother's sperm donor (my Father) left for The Sh!tty City.
Where I am now, I adamantly refuse. I don't respect bosses that barely respect themselves, whoring their laughter & fraudulent positivity out to whoever gives them some false hope of further benefits.
Constant change?
Yea, I understand that's life.
Where I am?
It's dictated by balding white collar goons sporting size 46 waists, alligator suitcases & lunch breaks at Lakeview Golf Course.
Today, Morton told me I don't belong here. Jacobs said the same shortly after.
Comfort is one thing, but when I see light a mile away at the end, but destruction & despair within arms reach, I'm working on not being discouraged. I'm teaching myself to persevere.
The measure of a man is not how he conducts himself when things are rosey, but how he reacts when his back is against the wall.
I'm willing to die against the wall. Not limp & hopeless, but defiant & driven.
However, if it is really mine... I won't have to.

"Born alone, die alone,
no crew to keep my crown or throne
I'm deep by sound alone,
Caved inside in a thousand miles from home
I need a new n*gga, for this black cloud to follow,
Cause while it's over me it's too dark to see tomorrow..."

My Mind Spray.