My Mind Spray: Keep It One Hun'ned

New Year 2010 = Back to Work.
It's like that first day back to our regularly scheduled programming smacks me with a little dose of reality, makes me put things in perspective.
I have breezed through the holidays with reckless abandon & here I am, back at the office wondering where the time went. Between securing deadlines & making new deals for 2010 with some excellent partners, it makes me analyze where am I now, & where am I going. More importantly as of late, who is coming with.
"Ex Sendin Latenight Txts Cause She Don't Know How To Let Go,Go,Go..."
Yesterday I went to Scarborough to a music studio w/ 1 of my homegirls, all in the name of checking out this new producer she may work with. She's an amazing chick & is damn near the female equivalent of me, therefore she's the sh*t. More importantly, I actually respect her mind more than her curves. She's synonymous with Pigs that Fly, Rare. Regardless, dude wants her to be a part of his label, make music & such. After the less than exhilerating pitch, on the way back, her & I got to talking, when the topic of "us" came up, as it normally does.
I dont mind talking about "us". I def dont mind kicking it with her. Should I mind that she has a man? Should I not worry myself with her attachments & do what I'd like? I thought about it after I left, because I've initiated actions that disrespect her situation.
I'm torn.
"My girl got a girlfriend..."
I've known this one girl for years, over a decade, however we've failed miserably at staying in touch. She's a respectable chick, pretty, has gotten it in previously w/ ZiggaZagga. I bump into her now & again, sometimes shes working the event, sometimes she's a patron. She's got a friend that I met virally, & only met in person within the last few months. She's a very dope chick too; straight up, no holds barred. Sometimes its a bit much to handle, but I manage. One has the immediate draw & attraction inside & out, but I dont know much about her anymore. The other I spend more time with & could grow to appreciate, she's a good woman, & is well rounded. Decisions...I strongly believe that you don't lose women chasing money, but you lose money and sometimes sight of your priorities chasing women. That's what the picture means to me. I think, therefore I am single. Real talk.
My homegirl from LA, just moved to NY, & she's on my ass about my female companions. This is what made me consider it in a serious fashion. Her being a chick from my past, (circa '97) she knows me, & is steady tryna find out who I'm with to get a better understanding of who I am today, as she says my surroundings should accurately reflect my being, who I am.
Do I not know myself because I don't know who I am with?
As my mind spray, I'm torn...still.